Not all Songs are for Christmas

It's the Christmas season and that means the radio is full of holiday music. But there are some songs that are deemed "Christmas music" that have always grated on my nerves.

I'm not talking about the various renditions of classics by popular artists that make me want to scream in pain, seriously how nasally can we make "Silent Night" before my head pops? (gag) I'm talking about lyrics. Take "Home for the Holidays". It's a cute song, but there is one line that always bothers me. "From Atlantic to Pacific, gee, the traffic is terrific." Really? Maybe if you're on crack. I really think someone slipped something extra into this writer's egg nog because the traffic is never "terrific" on the holidays. It's nightmarish, enough to make one curl up in a ball and hide in the trunk. I avoid traveling during holidays like I do the plague.

Then there are the holiday songs filled with winey celebrities. They go something like "You're all evil because it's Christmas and people in Africa don't even know and you get to cuddle up in you warm house with your gifts and are such jerks. You should listen to us and give all your money to these poor people. Just ignore the fact that we're celebrities and only singing a stupid song when we have millions we could give. We'll bug you instead." Yeah, I love those cheesy-trying-to-make-you-feel-guilty songs about as much as I love my yearly check-up with my OBGYN.

There's also a group of songs that have nothing to do with Christmas, except that they mention "snow" or "Christmas" once in the lyrics. Like this one song I heard the other day on the radio about two ex-lovers meeting in the frozen food section of the grocery store, trying to catch up, but feeling a void in their lives from a love that never lasted. At the end the snow outside turns to rain. Oh, I feel the cheer from that one! Excuse me while I go drown my sorrows with a jug of eggnog and a carton of truffles.

Seriously people, Christmas is a fun and wonderful holiday that celebrates the birth of the Savior and the magic of imagination and giving embodied in Santa Claus. These are happy things. I want my Christmas music to be beautiful, inspiring, and fun. None of this winy, preachy, depressing garbage. That's not what Christmas is about.

Family Pictures

We did family pictures last night. It's been awhile since the last time we had them done Jimmy was a baby. We didn't want to do them last year right before Jacob was born and the pictures became outdated. So this year we took the plunge. The kids were all AMAZING. The photographers were surprised how well they all behaved. Me too! We got a lot of photos taken and so I am going to post a bunch. Better get my money's worth!

Save me from Dr. Phil!

I should be laying down before the baby wakes up from his nap, Anna gets home from school, and the Dynamic Duo come back from playing at a friend's, but I am blogging instead. After all, quiet moments are rare.

I just finished wrapping a bunch of Christmas gifts. I thought I'd take advantage of not having any kids around and get it over with. Yes, I am done with my shopping minus a few items. But overall, I am done! It's a wonderful feeling. It helps to start early and keep it simple. But I digress.

While wrapping presents I thought I'd actually watch something on tv. (Gasp, right? Does the tv go on any channels other than Nick Jr during the day? Is it possible?) Then I remembered why I never try to watch anything during the daylight hours because there is nothing good on. Some things never change even after you grow up. I could pick a variety of soaps to watch, but my life has enough drama in it already and the only hunk that makes my heart skip a beat is currently in a Washington County court room. Or Dr. Oz can show me what diabetes does to my body by using hammers, drywall, and broken glass. (He knows how to make medicine exciting. Daytime tv at it's best!) Then there's Dr. Phil. Ugh. What new drama is he going to save us from today. Thank goodness for Dr. Phil! The man reminds me of a southern preacher and actually thinks he can perform earth shattering miracles. At least his ego claims to. Or how about "Inside Edition", where I can learn all about Tiger Woods and his many mistresses? Do I care? Thanks for proving that your fame has made you as idiotic as all the other celebrities. At that point "Diego" was looking pretty tempting. Good thing I finished wrapping my gifts and was saved from trying to drudge through any more channels.

I have thought of the perfect torture to use on me, aside from waiting in the doctor's office. Strap me to a chair and force me to watch day time tv. I promise I'll be spilling all my secrets in no time.

Appearances Can Be Deceiving

Yesterday I went to Home Depot to get some new weather stripping for our front door. I've gone there enough times that I was smart enough to take the old stripping with me so I knew what kind to get. Pretty simple task. I was very grateful to the man and woman who were stocking stripping and helped me pick out the right kind. But I had even more fun reminding the male employee that appearances aren't always what they seem.

After helping me find the right size of stripping, this kind fellow started talking to me about installing it. He asked, "Do you have a husband?". I knew exactly where he was going this with this question and wish I had had of a great response, such as "Yes. Do you have a wife? Now that we're acquainted can we get on with the task at hand?" or "Isn't that a little too personal for weather stripping?", etc. I responded that I do and this man then told me that my husband could figure out how to install the stripping. (Whoa buddy! Back up there a minute!) I told him that, in fact, my husband didn't really do things like that, which is why I was the one out shopping for the stripping. "Oh", he responded and then told me he'd try to get a better answer from someone on how to install the stuff. I told him not to worry because I think I could figure it out since I was the one who took out the old weather stripping in the first place. Shot down, buddy!

I have to be perfectly honest that I was a little annoyed at this man's stupid sexist comment, especially in this day and age where there seems to be no limits to what one can do. Plus I don't like to be told that I can't do something. It makes sense to me that I do the home repairs. My husband has little time or interest in such things. Getting him to do home repairs is like pulling teeth because he hates it. I'm home a lot and I love to work with my hands. I have lists of projects I am continually working on to better beautify our home. Just because I'm lacking the male anatomy doesn't mean I am clueless when it comes to tools.

Maybe next time this guy will think before speaking and realize it's better to not judge a book by it's cover because you never know what's inside.