What's really unfair

Recently, in family email, we had a discussion about life being unfair and that is just how it is supposed to be. We had some great insights shared and shown that life needs to be unfair for us to all fully take advantage of the Atonement. It got me thinking about things and how there really are certain parts of life that are just plain unfair and totally bug me. You thought you were going to get some spiritual post from me, but no, I'm just going to go off on the things I find unfair.

1. Muscles- why is it that I go to the gym on a regular basis, lift weights frequently, and yet only after months of this do my arms start showing some slight hint of muscle, when my husband plays racquetball off and on, doesn't lift weights, and still has much more definition than I do? Why is it so much easier for guys to get muscle? I'm not asking really why, I know why, but I still find it unfair. I have to run a marathon to get toned legs while my hubby can sneeze and build up his guns. Not fair!

2. Energy- how come my three year old can run non-stop all day and never tire, while I am beat by 1 pm? Not fair. I watch this little guy run up and down the sidewalk, jump off of the couch repeatedly, and still he has more energy to spare. Meanwhile, I hit a wall by the afternoon and am using all my will power to not fall asleep. If I could just bottle his energy for market, I would be rich.

3. Naps- why do little kids only get naps? I think Spain has it right. We all need to have siestas in the afternoon. What a big difference a power nap would make in my day. Adults get crabby too when they are tired.

4. Aging- what is up with body changes? Seriously, all of a sudden something stops working or functions differently with your body? Did anyone ask my permission for this to happen? Where's the memo stating at a certain date this new change will go into effect? No, it just happens and you have to try to figure out what on earth is going on and why. Not cool.

5. Eating- I remember being a teenager and throwing back all sorts of junk food, feeling fine, and not looking any different for it. Now it just isn't the same. I feel like my mom (ahhhhhhh!) because I remember her talking about some foods being "too rich" or "spicy" or "gassy". Since when is broccolli my enemy? Since when is pop or a decadent dessert too much? Why do I have that feeling of having a diabetic coma after eating some naughty treat? And why do those calories not magically disappear like they did in my youth? Not fair!

6. Gravity- You know where I am going with this one. Seriously, why? Wonder bras can only do so much. What we all need is a Miracle Bra.

7. Pimples- hey, if my body is going to act like it is older and no longer a teenager, then enough with the zits, people. Granted, they are not a common as they were in my younger days, but what is up with a random break-out or mondo zit? No, if my body is going to act "adult" then no more zits, period. Pick an age and stick with it!

Ok, so those are just a few things that bug me and are really, just plain unfair. Yet, with all of that and the changes that life brings, I wouldn't want my journey to be any different. Life just seems to be getting better and better the older I get, even if some things remain totally unfair.

Time to become a fashion designer

I love fashion. I always have. When I was a young girl, I had the ambition to become a fashion designer. I was constantly drawing women in various dresses, skirts, pants, outfits, etc, dreaming of the day when I would see my creations come to life. My brother and I would spend hours critiquing outfits we'd see out in public, going over what worked and what didn't. (Yes, we were kind of buttheads.) I love the way clothing can flatter a person and set the mood for whatever adventures lay ahead. Maybe it's the artist in me, but I really admire an outfit that makes a person shine and accentuates their features and figure. Sometimes this can be an issue when I see friends and family that I just want to help, give a few tips on how to better flatter their figures or hide their trouble areas. Not that I am an expert, but I am detail oriented and so notice the good and bad of every outfit. My own fashion has calmed down since having kids and moved more into the practical realm. I still love to look good and search out for that perfect little piece that adds to an outfit, but you won't be finding me running around the playground in any sort of heels, no matter how adorable, to catch my kiddies.

I mention my love of fashion because while at the mall today (Yes, I was at the mall today. It doesn't happen often, but I did promise the boys I would take them on the coin operated little rides there after going to the gym with me.) I happened to have the chance to study the "Prom" dresses at the Deb Store. I use the term "Prom" dresses loosely because I really don't consider that attire advertised for such an occasion to be appropriate for the said event. After looking at those dresses, which were located right by the ride-on toys, I started to wonder if perhaps I really should persue my childhood dream and become a designer. I don't think I could do worse than what was out there. And I know I could design more modest dresses. Ha! That wouldn't be hard! But I digress, I must share with you a few of my most favorites, or as I like to call them "fashion disasters".



 #1 The Pink Stripper- it's a bathing suit gone Prom dress! This outfit only works if you have 0% body fat, which means now not only can we see  pale flesh exploding out the sides at the beach, we can enjoy it at special occasions like Prom as well. Nothing is more flattering than walking around in a bra with a long skirt attached to the front. Plenty of places to shove dollar bills!

#2 The Drafty Disaster- I have NEVER liked the look of having the skirt shorter in the front and longer in the back. It seriously looks like someone cut out a part of this poor girl's dress. As if she isn't showing enough chest already, you'd think they would have used said cut portion to cover some of that cleavage.

#3 The Droopy Hippie- The tye dye is really taking away from the whole formal aspect of Prom so why not add a blingy belt to make it fancy again? Um, no. But let's address the real issue. Unless you are 10 and under, going bra-less is not a good thing. Someone needs to perk up and cover up here because we are getting way more than we bargained for.

#4 The Genie- When you think of this, do you not see Barbara Eden in "I Dream of Jeannie"? What were they thinking? Let's take the bra skirt dress and drape some different colored fabric around it. That'll make it look good! No, it looks like a Halloween costume and is even more hideous than the "Pink Stripper". Every girl's dream is to go to Prom dressed as a genie!

#5 Red Hot Skank- Someone call the police! This girl has stolen my lingerie!

 #6 Safari Explosion- Our model seems to be confused. Is she a zebra, lion, or giraffe?We all think African jungles can be pretty cool, but we don't want a dress that looks like someone took the jungle, ran over it with a steam roller, and called it a dress.

Oh fashion, you'll never let me down! There will always be something new and hideous every day to enjoy and make me wonder if I should become a designer.

Becoming

Tonight at bedtime I completely lost my patience with my kids, mainly sweet Anna, who is about as slow as New York City rush hour traffic when it comes to getting ready for bed. I love the girl, but she can  drag getting ready for bed into some epic adventure that leaves me shooting fire from my eyes and foaming at the mouth. Goodbye to those plans of being the calm sweet mom and say hello to the mean mom from Hades who is doing all she can not to unleash her full powers of darkenss.

I don't know what it is about bedtime that gets me, but it always does. I am fine putting down the kids who are all sweet and cuddly and kissy. Give me a million Jacob hugs every day. But it is the kids who fight me that drive me mad. I am sure part of it has to do with it being the END of the day, where my energy has been spent and all I want to do is sit down without anyone asking me for juice, telling me about the newest trick the cats did, or playing the piano over and over. Just give me some peace and a chance to gather myself. Any time taken away from that precious gem of rest just makes me scream.

Of course, I always feel like a fool when the situation is over and I realize I have yet again lost my temper. Not that I yell, but I've gotten myself worked up and angry and feel silly for having done so. Really, don't I know better? Does it really help the situation or magically get Anna to go to bed faster? (Only when the fire starts shooting out of my eyes.)

But then again, I am imperfect and thank goodness for that! If I had to be perfect now, bedtime alone would condemn me to the darkest corner of existence. Thank goodness for the knowledge that one day I can be perfect and, as long as I am trying to be better every day, there is hope for me. Hallelujah for knowing that my Father in Heaven and the Savior are perfect, and so, don't throw childish tantrums at me when I mess up. No shooting flames out of Their eyes if I refuse to go to bed. No, They are much more better than that, which gives me great hope of how I can become one day.

For now, it's just one bedtime at a time. Let's hope tomorrow we can avoid the foaming at the mouth.

Thunder Over Utah 2012

That tiny little black thing on top of the airplane is a wing walker

Blue Angels baby!

Two upside down two rightside up. Pretty cool!

Rachel and I

Love Jimmy's smile

Watching the show

The crazy amazing wing walker lady

Saturday we took the kids to the air show just here in St. George. They had really wanted to go and we figured it would be fun. Plus the Blue Angels would be there and who hasn't heard about all the cool stuff they can do?! So we went and had a blast. There was a tank demonstration, Raptors, a Marine Osprey, a wing walker, and the Blue Angels. The wing walker was amazing, riding on top of the plane while it did flips, rolls, and dives. Craziness! And the blue Angels were amazing with their tight formations. It was fun, even if it was a bit windy and, hence, dusty.

Jacob has declared he wants a Blue Angel plane in the backyard and Jimmy wants a tank. I think it was a big success. And I think we need a bigger backyard.

It's always the whackos that ruin it for the rest of us

Why are there always some crazy people out there that make the rest of us vegetarians look insane? (I mean really, you can insert anything in there instead of "vegetarians". It applies to crazy Mormons, crazy women, etc. There are always nut jobs making the rest of us sane people look bad.) People don't remember the normal vegetarians, no, they remember the ones that splatter themselves in red paint and act like murder victims, showing that "meat is murder". Or the ones who splash fur coats with paint. Or any of the other crazy things you've heard about nutty PETA people doing.

Today my husband shared with me a comment he read on Facebook, underneath one of those shared sayings, about how there is no reason to eat meat. Well, said whacko commenter basically said that eating meat is as bad as being a pedophile or raping a woman because you are harming and torturing the innocent. That's right, if you eat meat, you're as bad as a pedophile AND rapist. Were you even aware of your serious evil horrible crime the last time you picked up a hamburger? You foul demon from the pit of Hades! Put that steak down, pervert!

Honestly, I am offended. Seriously offended. Not because you eat meat, but because some idiot compared eating meat to rape and pedophilia. Are you completely off your rocker, dude? What on earth are you thinking?!!! Have you ever talked to a rape victim or seen the long lasting damaging effects towards a child who was molested. And eating meat is as bad as that? Do you live under a rock?! Did you just get released from the mental hospital because your morals are super-duper whacked!!!!

Not to mention the fact that I, as a woman, who is of the gender that most likely are victims are rape, do not like being compared to a cow, chicken, or pig. Isn't that in direct contradiction to feminism and aren't all crazy veg heads feminists? Perhaps our fellow commenter didn't think that one through. Personally, I like to think that I am a tad more capable than a COW. I am not a defenseless as Bessie and, please, do not ever tell me I am if you want to keep your body in one piece.

Thank you, completely insane wharped veggie dude for making the rest of us vegetarians look like whack jobs. As if people don't already think we are insane for skipping out on roast.

If only . . .

Even though I like the benefits of being human and a grown-up, sometimes I really wish I was a cat or little kid, and could just nap and relax whenever I wanted. My biggest worry being whether there was food in my bowl or if my Angry Birds t-shirt was clean. Ah, the simple life.