Would you be jealous of you?

I had an epiphany the other that perfectly describes my attitude towards myself, something I find a lot of women experience. This came to my mind, "If I wasn't myself, I would be jealous of me."

Now I say that not to sound snotty, but to point out one of my greatest flaws, my inability to see the good things that I do and have. Instead of recognizing the things I do right and the good in my life, I tend to focus on what I do wrong and the things that go crazy. If I miss exercising for a day, have a random car problem, a tough day with the kids, or don't have feel confident in my calling, then that becomes the focus of my day. Forget all the good I accomplish by caring for my children, playing with and reading to them, making crafts with them, the mountain of laundry that gets washed, folded, and put away, groceries that are bought, and dinner cooked. Or my beautiful home, sweet children, amazing husband, financial security, food in my cupboards, etc. Or the fact that I do my visiting teaching every month, faithfully fulfill my calling without ever going insane, and read my scriptures daily despite not being able to ever have the privacy to pee by myself. Nope, gotta focus on the cookie I ate after lunch, the arms that aren't toning as fast as I want, that stupid pimple that showed up last night, how I yelled at the kids before bed, or how my faith still has a long way to go.

I know I am not the only woman who goes through this. And I know people who deal with depression are more often overwhelmed with the little daily glitches. But that doesn't mean we want to be this way or try to. It just happens. It takes effort to think differently.

That's why I was really struck with the thought of seeing myself through someone else's eyes. Not how I think people see me, but how I really am. I began to count my blessings and see that I am a pretty awesome person and have a lot to be thankful for. I am one of those women I look up to because they seem to have it all together. It made me stop and ponder today before getting upset or down over the little things. It made me give myself allowance for imperfections because they aren't that life ruining as I thought. Who cares? Is it really that big of a deal?

The next time you find yourself depressed about your life or your body, try to see yourself how others see you. Would you be jealous of you? Would you think yourself one of those amazing beautiful righteous women who seem to have so much good in their lives? If you're honest, really honest, the answer will be yes. And then those little or big imperfections of life won't seem like much after all.