Accepting the Pooch

When I gave birth to my first child, I felt prepared. I took the prenatal class and had learned all about childbirth and what to expect. However, no one told me about what happens to your stomach after you give birth. After gazing at my beautiful baby girl, I glanced down and noticed what used to be my firm stomach was now replaced with a mass of sagging flesh. What?! I wanted to call the doctor, nurses, and security and demand an explanation. Had I passed out and no one told me? Surely I had and during my unconsciousness some horrible accident had happen, leaving my stomach doughy and streaked. Something had to be done! This wasn't the stomach I had started out with! I felt robbed. No one had told me about this part.

Now I'm four babies later and a little bit wiser. Well, somewhat. I'm impatient in general and obsessive when it comes to my body. Having Twiggy and Twiggier for sisters doesn't help. Somehow I got blessed to have the solid German body. I've always feared ending up a woman with hips that can fit up to six or more passengers. I still tried on my pants a few days after getting home from the hospital. Gotta see how much I have left to lose before I can wear them again, right? I still do try them on periodically. And I still get frustrated that I haven't bounced back to my pre-baby size. Hello, I've been exercising for a month! Why isn't the skin just sucking itself back into place? Let's go body! Get a move on! Like I said, I've only become a little bit wiser.

Now I admit, but don't tell my husband because then he'll know I really do know, I think I look pretty good after having had four kids, with the youngest being a two month old. I know that, but yet I still get bummed out about having the dough belly and baby hips that take time to firm up. I don't like the way my body looks right now. And because I get blue over my "softer" self, I forget what really is important in all of this. The reason why I have the stomach I do is because I had four beautiful children. Friday night as I played Red Rover and Red Light/ Green Light with the three older kids, giggling to our heart's content, I thought about how much I love my kids and how glad I am they are mine. Or when I catch Jacob's eye and his smile flashes, legs kick, and mouth coos at me, I know I am the most important person in his world. How I have the power to chase away all bogeymen and monsters to make my three year old feel safe at night. Or to snuggle up with my four year old when she is hurt and know she feels loved. Listening to my six year old read and seeing the pride beaming from her face as she finishes the book on her own.

I am a mom! My job is priceless and important to the sweet children I raise. Who cares about a little old pooch that doesn't disappear in two months? And, plus, that skin is a sign of something amazing my body and I did. I'm sure I'll still get frustrated while I work on getting my pre-baby body back, but I am going to try to be better at not letting some silly lose skin take away from my joy in being a mom to four adorable and precious children.