Eliza Says It Best

Women should be women and not babies that need petting and correction all the time. I know we like to be appreciated but if we do not get all the appreciation which we think is our due, what matters? We know the Lord has laid high responsibility upon us, and there is not a wish or desire that the Lord has implanted in our hearts in righteousness but will be realized, and the greatest good we can do to ourselves and each other is to refine and cultivate ourselves in everything that is good and ennobling to qualify us for those responsibilities.
Eliza R. Snow

That has become my favorite quote, thought, insight, counsel, whatever you call it as of late. It has been going through my mind over and over and caused much pondering (perish the thought!) I need to tattoo this on my forehead so I see it every morning in the mirror when I wake up. Or at least write it somewhere I can see it and put it into practice daily. I admit, I fully and openly admit that I like to be coddled and praised at times and get frustrated when I've been pushed to my limit and feel I have not been praised with fanfare, confetti, and parades. Don't people know how hard it is to do it all? Don't my children know all I sacrifice for them? Don't others realize how hard it is to serve and let my husband serve sometimes? Don't they know I want a break?

But then I read the second part of the quote and realize, it doesn't matter. Will the world stop rotating and end in destruction if my husband does not come home from work and thank me for the slew of things I accomplished that day? Will the work I did as a mother, teacher, and wife of the bishop be any less important? Of course not, but my ego won't get the attention it so desires. Wouldn't it be better to look beyond this earthly sphere and realize that God sees and knows all? He's keeping a tally and He is grateful for all the good we do in the world around us. We may not always feel or see the good we generate, but He knows and He blesses us for it.

As Sister Snow points out, when we look to the Lord, setting our hearts on Him and not worldly praise, then we become refined and qualify to do all that we were sent here to fulfill. Whenever I get frustrated with my children or husband because I feel unappreciated, I get crabby and bitter. It's hard to feel the Spirit, it's tough to feel charity towards anyone else. If I lash out in anger with harsh words, I soon regret it and the loss of the Spirit that accompanies it. Then I feel doubly worse for being so petty and selfish. I pick up and try to move forward, hoping I won't lose my temper again. How much better would it be if I stopped looking for praise and just do what needs to be done. Isn't service better when you do it with an open heart, not seeking reward or praise? Of course, it is good to show gratitude in families and marriages, but always seeking out praise is not. How much happier and more fulfilled would my life be if I look up and realize that all I do I do for the Lord, who sees all and knows my heart, who blesses me daily for my sacrifices, and sustains me in all my earthly work.

One day I may actually get it, but I'll just keep trying until then. After all, isn't that what this life is for?