Get over it, get help, and move on

I've never understood why going to a counselor for help has such a negative connotation. I have known way too many people in my life who would seriously benefit from some visits with a therapist and yet refuse to do so. I just don't get it. How can learning how to be a better individual or couple be a bad thing?

Let's say I have a cut on my hand that got infected. I pretend it's no big deal,put a band-aid on it, and go on my merry way. A day or two passes and it gets worse with swelling and pus. I have soreness in my entire hand and have a hard time using it. But I insist it will get better on it's own and leave it be. Soon I am unable to use my entire arm that has the infected hand. If I don't get professional help I will most likely die or be very very sick. Wouldn't I be a complete idiot to continue to ignore my infection? Would you see me as a weakling for seeking out a professional, a doctor, who could help me?

The same applies for counseling. Too often I have seen people who are miserable and yet refuse to seek help because they don't want to be seen as weak or crazy. (Excuse me while I bang my head on the wall.) Life on this earth is too short to spend it in misery! The Lord doesn't want us to suffer! I've watched loved ones live their lives in sadness because they cannot overcome the pride that holds them back from seeking professional counseling.

Well I've been to counseling and am a better person for it. I grew up in quite the interesting family situation. I've gone through three marriages and divorces with my mom, not to mention a slew of other adventures. No matter what people say, your upbringing does shape you. And I realized that and did not want to continue that cycle of broken relationships and misery. So I did something "crazy" and got help. I learned more about who I am and how much I have internalized from my childhood and teenage experiences. I now have the tools I need to be a happy person and have a healthy marriage. I can catch myself when I start to fall into a pattern, recognize it for what it is, stop, and move on.

Marriage counseling is a wonderful thing. Again, I wish some members of my sweet family would give it a try. If you say you care about your marriage and you notice a problem forming, then why wouldn't you go and get help? It seems like you really don't care if you can't overcome your pride and seek counseling. Get over yourself and suck it up. It's not easy to admit needing help, but it doesn't mean you've failed or are a horrible person. On the contrary, I'd say you've failed in your marriage if you don't seek out the Lord and professional help before you let it get worse or even end. In fact, I think it would be great if all engaged couples had to go through a counseling course before being married. Men and women are different on their own without bringing in varying family backgrounds, cultures, and personalities. It'd do a lot of good to learn about those differences and how to communicate before entering into marriage.

Think of it in a Gospel perspective. We all are imperfect and can't do it on our own. Without the Lord we would suffer death, both physically and spiritually. But thanks to His Atonement we don't have to, if we come unto Him and be perfected through Him. That means we HAVE to admit that we have weaknesses. We HAVE to be humble. We HAVE to seek His help. If we don't, we're on our own and we're finished. If we can't admit it ourselves or our spouse that we have faults, how do we ever expect to humble ourselves before the Lord?

There's no point living life in misery. Counseling, either for ourselves or our marriage, is a good thing. I applaud people who seek out professional help. As in all things, the key is left to one's self to make the change once one goes through therapy. But one can't change unless one learns how. Hmmm, becoming a better person, what's to lose?